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i want to go with ah heng to the blah blah place... who cares. i dun mind... i am determined. if my actions are always reported then where's my freedom? then might as well i totally dun tell anyone of where i am goin... ergh! i hate it... what's the point? let go of me! ergh... stop thinking that i am stupid.. asshole.



Finally let go of everything i owned... i couldn't help but feel a bit lighter, like the weight of the world has been lifted from me. i am sad. my heart is just so sore. haha... i think this is natural.. it will be gone when the hols start on fri! haha... so happy... weeee...

went home via bus... so tired. maybe it is just too much for me to take. maybe i never got my nap.. anyway it is over, no use talking over it.

waiting for the fresh breeze to clear my head...



letting go of everything i owned. did not hurt that much i expected. but still hurts... less than on sat.. haha... maybe i shld just go woodbridge... hehe... oopx... managed to changed my url...think gonna changed my number next... haix... boo... bad idea... i dun noe him anymore... haha...













here are some of pics taken over a long period of time!



BAD NEWS!
Dunno whether should i be happy anot.

my mind is a blank. what happened? even i did not anticipate this to happen. wows.

only time will tell.



IT has been far too long since i went out with BESTS friends.. time to do it this hols. gona go eat katong laksa at holland v with cheryl!!! yippeee.. haha.. miss the laksa man!!! it is super duper nice... hehe... went there onli once and will remember the place forever.. yup that is how good the food is.. hehe... oh yah... candice i haven forgotten you...thanx for asking me if i am alright... haha.... i am ok...see ya soon kaes? think gonna watch movie with you... hehe...

my dear lyn...i am booking you for the first week of my hols. i dun care. i am goin out with you... boo! haha...

actually i am studying for bstats now. dunno why think abt hols alr.. hehe... maybe i am just being optimistic... oopx. anyways. gonna go back to studying le... haix...



wahaha... yesh!!! 3 more days and i will get back what i want. more sleep. finished early for todays paper. then decided to leave early but ms lee is just too nice to let me leave. haha... but i alr checked all that. haha... have faith in me~

wed is 99cents for colour plates at suki. i am always working but this week i deserve a treat.

i dunno what the heck is wrong with me. been coughing and sneezing. like i wanna care much. fri is my happy day gonna celebrate. although it will kill me someday but the date is alr set. and things are bought there is no way for me to back out. haha... oopx.

sorry? HA HA HA.



FINALLY managed to contact my long lost yet never forgotten friend. haha... lots of thing has happened since we haven met. we used to meet once a week... it is time to go back to old times ok gal? haha... thats how much i love you... oops. my ex.. what else are you? haha...

i have always been happy with you! and I WILL definitely go out with you sometime soon... cannot be too sure.

coz i got things to settle. things that cause my life to turn almost topsy turvy. things that caused me to cry while walkin back home from the mrt station. things that make me break down after a couple of drinks in front of jui peng. things that made me feel so hurt i lost touch of myself. it made me so crazy. it made me feel so painful inside. so painful i cant stop crying even while bathing. it made me so hurt that i forgot what i was doing, forgot who i am. this is how serious it is. now i still cant stop crying. i am weeping all over again writing this post. cant stop. i have forgotten all about my feelings and onli noe how to please others. my heart is hurting again, wait. did it ever stop hurting? my eyes are swollen. but tears still flow like water flowing from the mountains. it can never stop can it? it is eating me inside out. i am almost empty. but i am stopping it alr. din noe it could do such a damage. cos it was numb at first. but now it hurts too much to be true. it is like a nightmare, never knowing when you will wake up from it. i want to wake up. thats why i am drinking, it is also destroying me. so hurt. now the pain is numbing pain. ergh. liyana, help me. stop this. support me before i do stupid things again. help me stop crying. will you be there? will you not leave me? will you disappoint me? ergh. stupid tears.



doin all the last minute studying now.. haha... cant seem to get it all inside. not goin to use my hp for the week coz it is cts! ergh. i hope it will soon be over. i hope for hols to come!!!!

Your Birthdate: July 3

You are certain and confident when you choose to love someone. Even though your romantic choices may be unconventional - you stand behind them. Your friends never know you as well as a romantic partner does. Number of True Loves You'll Have: 3 Number of Times You'll Have Your Heart Broken: 5 You are most compatible with people born on the 3rd, 12th, 21st, and 30th of the month.

my mood now is so much better than before. managed to think things through.

will always love my baby no matter what.



booo.... i look like i wanna cry. haha... what do you think? haven been happy for a long time. far too long? when will my life be better?

haha... but i still got things in life really nice. so can i say let me look on the bright side!

hols are coming! yippe... but exams are here first. haha... this is life. good things always come after bad things.


dun cry jiamin:sab



YOU can never believe what happened today!!! I had a really bad day! But fortunately i am seriously not affected by it? why? ooh. i am trying to find out.

first i woke up to find my head aching, yesterday bumped my head a lot of times but did not realise it was this serious. anyway have two pain spots. touch it and i could kill you. then went off to sch abt 1215 or so... wasn't late... hehe...

the class was ok, but my grp mates aren't two of them are retarded. haha... shldn't be so bad. one is like the loudspeaker. you can be 200% sure that ppl our class knows what we are discussing about! haha.. can you imagine. he is easily agitated that i refused to talk to him, so afraid that i will give him attitude. haha... then he was like talking so loud abt "new inventions" that i got really irritated, then i said something about a sound reducer that makes people speak softly. so when you scream it is normal decibels level? haha.. and my other groupmates could not stop laughing... oops. haha.. and he cant stand me. wahaha...

then another one is a girl. she is really mountain tortoise, i dun mind the fact that she does not noe anything. but at least she can try to be less itchy hand... she is seriously freaking me out. once she keep poking through my pencil case... then she touch my bag.. then once i was in the lift with her to another class she started stroking my hair! eeeeh... makes me feel so freaky. can you imagine? stroke my hair? not even my close galfriends do that. haha... cant stand her. oh! did you know she is 21 years old? huh? the first time i heard that i was like what? haha.. maybe she just need time...

hmmm... got to go le... super sleepy... hehe... nites!



Baby, all i can say is sorry... i love you

Get well soon!



Hmmm.. thinking abt changing a new url for my blog... is kind of sudden... fed up with some things or should i say i have thought things through... and i have made several decisions to save me from a time bomb that could destroy me.

not really happy making this decision but hey. it could mean a brighter future... i am not that scared anymore. although there are scarifices but it is better than when the whole matter is about to burst and i cant withdraw from that situation. that is the dificult part. haha... i am hurt. but it is all part of growing up. doesn't even matter i cry. coz it is all over. dun wish to be part of this... i know i might regret saying this later... haha... i am crazy le... just let me die!



i jusr changed my blog again!!!! it is so nice! it totally suits me for now!!!

hmmm... we should always cherish the things we have cause you have no idea when it would be gone...

You Should Be A Cancer

What's good about you: you're incredibly kind, caring, and generous What's bad about you: you can be too moody and impossible to understand In love: you enjoy wining and dining the object of your affection In friendship, you're: likely to depend on other friends for emotional support Your ideal job: historian, marine biologist, or religious figure Your sense of fashion: you dress to match your mood You like to pig out on: classic home cooked meals, like mac and cheese

Your Luck Quotient: 85%

You have an extremely high luck quotient. Not only do you consider yourself lucky, probably everyone you know does too. But you're smart enough to know that you've mostly made your own luck. By being positive, open, and flexible, a lot of luck has come your way!

Your Power Color Is Teal

At Your Highest: You feel accomplished and optimistic about the future. At Your Lowest: You feel in a slump and lack creativity. In Love: You tend to be many people's ideal partner. How You're Attractive: You make people feel confident and accepted. Your Eternal Question: "What Impression Am I Giving?"

Your Expression Number is 5

A total multi-tasker, you have a wide variety of talents. You're very versatile and able to change at a drop of a hat. A free spirit, you crave change and adventure. Clever and quick witted, you can convince anyone of anything. You can do anything you desire... though this sometimes gets you in trouble! Very popular, you're always thinking up new ways to entertain and amuse your friends. Your restless and impatient attitude means you don't stay with projects for long. You tend to be erratic and scattered - it's hard for you to focus. You often find yourself in a state of flux with constantly changing interests.

You Are Apple Red

You're never one to take life too seriously, and because of it, you're a ton of fun. And although you have a great sense of humor, you are never superficial. Deep and caring, you do like to get to the core of people - to understand them well. However, any probing you do is light hearted and fun, sometimes causing people to misjudge you.

Your Aura is Blue

Spiritual and calm, you tend to live a quiet but enriching life. You are very giving of yourself. And it's hard for you to let go of relationships. The purpose of your life: showing love to other people Famous blues include: Angelina Jolie, the Dali Lama, Oprah Careers for you to try: Psychic, Peace Corps Volunteer, Counselor

You Are 100% Psychic

You are so very psychic. But you already predicted that, didn't you? You have "the gift" - and you use it daily to connect with others. You're very tapped into the world around you... Just make sure to use your powers for good!

Your Love Style is Storge

For you, love and friendship are almost the same thing And your love tends to be the enduring, long lasting kind (You've been known to still have connections with exes) But sometimes your love is not the most passionate Leap before you look, and you'll find that fire you crave

Your Five Factor Personality Profile

Extroversion: You have medium extroversion. You're not the life of the party, but you do show up for the party. Sometimes you are full of energy and open to new social experiences. But you also need to hibernate and enjoy your "down time." Conscientiousness: You have high conscientiousness. Intelligent and reliable, you tend to succeed in life. Most things in your life are organized and planned well. But you borderline on being a total perfectionist. Agreeableness: You have medium agreeableness. You're generally a friendly and trusting person. But you also have a healthy dose of cynicism. You get along well with others, as long as they play fair. Neuroticism: You have high neuroticism. It's easy for you to feel shaken, worried, or depressed. You often worry, and your worries prevent you from living life fully. You tend to be emotionally reactive and moody. Your either flying very high or feeling very low. Openness to experience: Your openness to new experiences is high. In life, you tend to be an early adopter of all new things and ideas. You'll try almost anything interesting, and you're constantly pushing your own limits. A great connoisseir of art and beauty, you can find the positive side of almost anything.

Your Five Variable Love Profile

Propensity for Monogamy: Your propensity for monogamy is medium. In general, you prefer to have only one love interest. But it's hard for you to stay devoted for too long! There's too much eye candy to keep you from wandering. Experience Level: Your experience level is medium. You probably have had a couple significant loves. And you may have even had your heart broken. But you haven't really dated a wide variety of people. Dominance: Your dominance is low. This doesn't mean you're a doormat, just balanced. You know a relationship is not about getting your way. And you love to give your sweetie a lot of freedom. Cynicism: Your cynicism is medium. You'd like to believe in true and everlasting love... But you've definitely been burned enough to know better. You're still an optimist, but you also are a realist. Independence: Your independence is medium. In relationships, you need both "me time" and "we time." You usually find it easy to be part of a couple. But occasionally you start to feel a little smothered.

Your Birth Month is July

Introspective and intense, you tend to be a deep thinker. You are quiet and spiritual - and you have a unique perspective on life. Your soul reflects: Lightness, luck and an open heart Your gemstone: Ruby Your flower: Larkspur Your colors: Green and red

You are 80% Cancer

You Have a Choleric Temperament

You are a person of great enthusiasm - easily excited by many things. Unsatisfied by the ordinary, you are reaching for an epic, extraordinary life. You want the best. The best life. The best love. The best reputation. You posses a sharp and keen intellect. Your mind is your primary weapon. Strong willed, nothing can keep you down. Your energy can break down any wall. You're an instantly passionate person - and this passion gives you an intoxicating power over others. At your worst, you are a narcissist. Full of yourself and even proud of your faults. Stubborn and opinionated, you know what you think is right. End of discussion. A bit of a misanthrope, you often see others as weak, ignorant, and inferior.

Finally can update on my blog! been such a long time!!! My much deserved break is finally here... but i still have to work on next sat and sun! Bleahx... it is not fair lorx... but i need $$$.. haix... only working on wed and weekends... hope can dun work but is it possible? i just heard xiu qin and jui peng's pay got raised! i was thinking when is it my turn. haha... i can wait... i am ever so patient.. haha... anyway i am happy for them! oooh...

oh yah... this week was super high cos i have finally regain my energy... was hyper during sch and my frens cant stand me anymore... boo!!! i love my hyper mood... no one can stand me during that time... make my fren laugh till high... esp sabrina!!! haha... she loves me... wahah.. no lahx... hehe...

ergh... I want to cut my hair... change my face and stuff... haha... joking... just wanted a new look... have enuff of myself.. bleahx....

let's start with sleeping well...

PROFILE LALALA. UNLIMITED.

Jiamin
Ordinary Gal
Madly In love with KELVIN LOW
BLAH BLAAHH

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